Just when you thought it was safe to go back to the mall

When was the last time you were in the mall? When was the last time you tried to get to your favorite store through the gauntlet of teenagers? You know, if I was older, I would probably be mad at all these directionless children with nothing better to do than be in my way. I just turned 36. All I think about when I see the throngs of young people in my way* is wow, I really hope I wasn’t that way when I was younger, all the while knowing full well that I was.
More so than when I was a teenager (in the 80’s!), accessories seem to be the order of the day. Big sunglasses, purses covered in bling and charms for your cell phones. (?)
I am thinking real hard, and I guess I do remember those weird little buckle things that we used to pull our oversized tee shirts through at the hip. Then there was the need for multiple color socks and layers of polo shirts with the collars sticking up. Izod, LeTigre, designer jeans, off the shoulder shirts with the lacy bra strap showing. The Madonna look, pegged pants, Reebok high tops, permed hair, the mullet when it was cool, that incarnation of Goth.
I guess I am finally old enough to see my teen years as an embarrassment not only to myself, but even to my parents. Having no children of my own, I know they can never have their revenge. They tell me they are okay with this, but in some deep dark corner of their minds, they know that I am having the last laugh by not having any children. HAHAHA!

*yes, they are still in my way.