Snacks, Fat and Curves

I joined Curves for Women, and 3 weeks ago I started Weight Watchers again. As much as I hate the word 'again.' One day I will figure it out and not have to 'again' this cycle ever... almost said it a second time, phew that was close.
Curves is a great place to let go of feeling icky and fat and be able to just be and sweat and at least get your heart pumping again. I like that I can go in, get sweaty in 35 minutes and be done with it. It got me back in the habit of working out too.
I am about 40lbs overweight, according to those horrific tables that they love to show you in the doctors offices, but in my mind I am 30lbs overweight. I am okay with that, I am on the back side of my 30s and I know that I will never be a size 2. Hell, I don't remember ever being a size smaller than a 7/8.
Seriously, even when I was a teenager, junior high even, I was a juniors size 7. I was a speed skater and the clothing manufacturers never figured out how to clothe an athletic body. Ahhh, how I miss that body. I look at pictures from then and even though I still thought I was fat, I was about 125lbs, I was rock hard. The really sad part is that was still on the upper end of my weight bracket for my age/height. WHATEVER!
When I was competing at a national level in my sport and my doctor still wants to tell me to lose 10 lbs. Ummm, bite me. If I was any less head strong than I am, I would have had a nice little eating disorder brewing. I have never been able to learn from hearing, I have to learn from mistakes and doing.
I am learning that one now. I learned that if you are working out all the time, the quality of the food you put in your body is pretty dang important, but the occasional fast food and ice cream is acceptable. But: the minute you stop working out with that kind of regularity, the amounts of food, and the fast food and ice cream have to get adjusted. My downfall was fast food.

Curves is my mistress
I seek solace in your walls
Thank you for the sweat.